Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Oh, the faggotry!

Hurricane Katrina is fucking gay!

So, as usual, the homos are to blame for the hurricane! I mean, I know we blew up the shuttle, and caused 9/11 and also have the power to summon tornadoes with our vaginas, but now we have the power to control the hurricanes too! Apparently, Southern Decadence, which is New Orlean's pridefest type thing, was supposed to take place this weekend, and these crazy ass motherfuckers think God intervened to stop it from happening. Of course, it's only been happening for 30 years, but it takes God a long time to be updated on the festivites. I would just like to say that "Southern Decadence" is a fabulous name. Props to whoever thought of it.

If blaming the hurricane on the gays doesn't float your boat (no pun intended), then there's always the crazies who say the STORM LOOKS LIKE A FETUS!!!OMG!11!!1!! and is therefore god's punishment for abortion clinics. That picture could pretty much resemble anything, however, and it's my personal opinion that the hurricane was a punishment from God for jellyfish (maybe octopus??) and their culture of faggotry.

Of course, those of us in the know know that the hurricane was really a punishment for all of that delicious shrimp gumbo (Leviticus 11:10) that New Orleans is known for. For more info on the faggotry of shrimp, please visit Godhatesshrimp.com.

Also, in non-relation to the hurricane, but on the grand theme of faggotry, some stupid ass man (who is speaking for the group Concerned
Women for America) is mad that the Girl Scouts are all lesbians who run around cutting off penises. How dare they take material out of their books that talks about becoming homemakers. Now young women will never learn how to make pies properly for their asshole husbands! Also, Girl Scouts are sinners because in the Girl Scout promise you can choose to substitute the word "God" with a word that pertains to your spiritual beliefs. How dare such an organization promote freedom of religion...HOW ANTI-AMERICAN. It's a travesty!

And, lastly, I'd just like to say that if dinosaurs existed (which is highly unilikely since the world is only 6,000 years old and it's been proven that the brontosaurus is not real) that the reason they were all killed was because they were gay abortion providers; really big, gay, abortion providers.

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